The Basic Ingredients of a Killer Thriller

by Jodie Renner, editor, author, speaker

 

Want to write a bestselling suspense novel? Who doesn’t? So what are the essential components of a riveting thriller? 

To compete in today’s competitive publishing marketplace, your thriller needs a charismatic, complex hero; a nasty, clever, determined villain; clever plotting, with lots of conflict, tension, and suspense; and a few twists and surprises, especially at the end. You need some gripping, heart-pounding scenes, each connected to the next and the story as a whole, with lots of direct cause and effect. And for maximum intrigue and reader satisfaction, it’s important to drop little tantalizing details and hints along the way, which all make sense at the end. 

For these reasons, it’s best to try to sketch out some kind of overall plan or plot list in advance; otherwise, you could get bogged down and drive yourself crazy climbing out of plot holes and rewriting scenes where your story goes off on tangents or just meanders or sputters to a halt. 

Your thriller plot should have a solid foundation you can build on, or the whole story could collapse around you in a muddled-up heap. Unless you have at least a major story question/problem in mind, if you just start writing to see where it takes you, you may end up with a lot of “and then...and then...and then...” scenes, with no real point or connection. Not to mention clues that end up going nowhere. This would leave your readers confused and irritated and could sink your reputation as a thriller writer. Even a rough road map will help you stay focused as you’re writing.

First, what are the basic ingredients of a riveting thriller?

James N. Frey sums it up: “To create a damn good thriller, you need to create a clever hero and send him or her on an ‘impossible’ mission to foil evil for the benefit of others.”

Here’s another definition of thrillers, from good old Wikipedia: “A broad genre of literature, film, and television programming that uses suspense, tension and excitement as the main elements. Thrillers heavily stimulate the reader’s or viewer’s moods, giving them a high level of anticipation, ultra-heightened expectation, uncertainty, surprise, anxiety, and/or terror. Thriller films tend to be adrenaline-rushing, gritty, rousing, and fast-paced. 

“A thriller provides the sudden rush of emotions, excitement, and exhilaration that drive the narrative, sometimes subtly with peaks and lulls, sometimes at a constant, breakneck pace with thrills. It keeps the audience cliff-hanging at the ‘edge of their seats’ as the plot builds towards a climax. Literary devices such as red herrings, plot twists, and cliffhangers are used extensively. A thriller is usually a villain-driven plot, whereby he or she presents obstacles that the protagonist must overcome.”

Ian Irvine describes a thriller plot succinctly:

“At its simplest, a story consists of a character (the hero) who wants something badly, and an adversary who is trying equally hard to prevent the hero from getting what he wants. In each scene, the hero attacks his problem in a new way, the adversary fights back, and the hero either fails or his initial success leads to a bigger problem.”

Or, in my opinion, you could approach it a different way and say that the villain drives the story and threatens peace and security, and the hero spends the whole story reacting to the threats and trying to stop the villain before he reaches his ultimate goal(s) and commits the most horrifying, devastating acts.

Either way you look at it, you need to get the readers emotionally involved from the very first sentence. Here’s how to do it, according to Jessica Page Morrell: “Involvement begins when you create a realistic world, implant an issue that demands to be resolved, and introduce a character or group of characters who are intensely interesting to readers.”

What’s the premise of your story?

What’s your story basically about? What’s your main story problem or question? Can you state it in three or four sentences? Fill this in before you start writing, so you have a clear picture in your mind of your hero’s main challenge to guide you as you go along:

(Protagonist’s name) is a ___________ who ________. But (first big encounter/conflict/problem).

Now (action sentence). Will (big dilemma, question)?

Your plot needs:

~ A clever, resourceful, likeable but complex protagonist with some baggage

~ A conniving, frightening, determined villain

~ An overriding, preferably high-concept problem

~ Other related conflicts

~ Interesting, unique supporting characters, usually on both sides

~ Plenty of intrigue, suspense, and tension

~ Some subtle foreshadowing sprinkled in here and there to incite reader curiosity

~ Some surprises or reversals

~ A final big, very close battle

~ A satisfying resolution, with a final twist or surprise, and all the major story questions answered.

Also, set your thriller in an interesting locale. And give your protagonist a character arc. He is usually not the same person at the end as he was at the beginning. The challenges and trials of the story have deeply affected her and changed her forever. Series characters tend to have a much less noticeable character arc.

Resources:

James N. Frey, How to Write a Damn Good Thriller

Ian Irvine, 41 Ways to Create and Heighten Suspense, www.ian-irvine.com/suspense

Jessica Page Morrell, Between the Lines

What are some other essential components of a thriller that sells? Share your ideas in the comments below.

For more tips on how to write a thriller readers can’t put down, see my popular book, Writing a Killer Thriller – An Editor’s Guide to Writing Compelling Fiction, available as an e-book or in trade paperback.

BIO:
Jodie Renner, a freelance fiction editor specializing in thrillers and other fast-paced fiction, has published two books to date in her series, An Editor’s Guide to Writing Compelling Fiction: WRITING A KILLER THRILLER and STYLE THAT SIZZLES & PACING FOR POWER, both available in e-book and trade paperback.

For more info, please visit Jodie’s author website or editor website, or find her on Facebook or Twitter.

Adding Suspense, Tension and Intrigue to Your Story

by Jodie Renner, editor & author

 

All genres of fiction, not just thrillers and action-adventures, need tension, suspense, and intrigue to keep readers eagerly turning the pages. And of course, you’ll need to ratchet up the tension and suspense a lot more if you’re writing a fast-paced, nail-biting page-turner.

Some “Big-Picture” Techniques for Adding Suspense:

~ First, make your readers care about your protagonist by creating a likeable, appealing, strong, smart and resourceful but vulnerable character, with some inner conflict. If readers haven’t bonded with your main character, they won’t care what happens to him or her.

~ Create a cunning, frightening villain. Your villain needs to be as clever, determined and resourceful as your protagonist – or even more so. Make him a serious force to be reckoned with!

~ Threaten your protagonist. Now that your readers care about your main character, insert a major threat or dilemma within the first chapter that won’t be resolved until the end. Create an over-riding sentence about this to keep in mind as you’re writing your story: Will (name) survive/stop/find/overcome (difficulty/threat)?

~ Establish a sense of urgency, a tense mood, and generally fast pacing. Unlike cozy mysteries and other more leisurely genres, thrillers and other suspense fiction generally need a tense mood and fast pacing throughout most of the novel, with short “breathers” in between the tensest scenes.

~ Show, don’t tell. Show all your critical scenes in real time, with action, reaction, and dialogue. Show your character’s inner feelings and physical and emotional reactions. Don’t have one character tell another about an important event or scene.

~ Use multiple viewpoints, especially that of the villain. For increased anxiety and suspense, get us into the head of your antagonist from time to time. This way the readers find out critical information the heroine doesn’t know, things we want to warn her about!

~ Keep the story momentum moving forward. Don’t get bogged down in backstory or exposition. Keep the action moving ahead, especially in the first chapter. Then work in background details and other info little by little, on an “as-needed” basis only, through dialogue or flashbacks.

~ Create a mood of unease by showing the main character feeling apprehensive about something or someone or by showing some of the bad guy’s thoughts and intentions. 

~ Add in tough choices and moral dilemmas. Devise ongoing difficult decisions and inner conflict for your lead character. Besides making your plot more suspenseful, this will also make your protagonist more complex, vulnerable, and interesting.

~ Withhold information. Don’t tell your readers too much too soon. Dole out information little by little, to tantalize readers and keep them wondering. Keep details of the past of both your protagonist and antagonist hidden, and hint at critical, life-altering experiences they’ve had that are impacting their present goals, desires, fears, etc. Add one tiny detail after another as you go along, or maybe a short flashback here and there.

~ Delay answers to critical plot questions. Look for places in your story where you’ve answered readers’ questions too soon, so have missed a prime spot to increase tension and suspense. Draw out the time before answering that question. In the meantime, hint at it from time to time to remind readers of its importance.

~ Use dramatic irony. This is where your readers know something critical and scary that the protagonist is not aware of. For example, your heroine is relaxing after a stressful day, unaware that the killer is prying open her basement window.

~ Add a ticking clock. Adding time pressure is another excellent way to increase suspense.

~ Use the setting to establish the mood and create suspense. This is the equivalent of ominous music, harsh lighting, strange camera angles, or nasty weather in a scary movie.

~ Use compelling, vivid sensory imagery to take us right there, with the protagonist, vividly experiencing and reacting to whoever/whatever is challenging or threatening her. And appeal to all five senses, not just the visual.

~ Put some tension in every scene. There should be something unresolved in every scene. Your character enters the scene with an objective and encounters obstacles in the scene, so she is unable to reach her goals.

~ Vary the tension. But of course, you can’t keep up tension nonstop, as it’s tiring for readers and will eventually numb them. It’s best to intersperse tense, nail-biting scenes with a few more leisurely, relaxed scenes that provide a bit of reprieve before the next tense, harrowing scene starts.

~ Use brief flashbacks at key moments to reveal your main character’s childhood traumas, unpleasant events, secrets, emotional baggage, hangups, dysfunctional family, etc.

~ Keep raising the stakes. Keep asking yourself, “How can I make things worse for the protagonist?” As the challenges get more difficult and the obstacles more insurmountable, readers worry more and suspense grows.

~ Plan a few plot twists. Readers are surprised and delighted when the events take a turn they never expected. Don’t let your readers become complacent, thinking it’s easy to figure out the ending, or they may stop reading.

Do you have any other techniques for building suspense to add to this list?

BIO:

Jodie Renner, a freelance fiction editor specializing in thrillers, has published two books to date in her series, An Editor’s Guide to Writing Compelling Fiction: WRITING A KILLER THRILLER, with the updated, expanded edition now available in e-book and paperback on Amazon; and STYLE THAT SIZZLES & PACING FOR POWER, available in paperback, for Kindle, and in other e-book formats.

For more info, please visit Jodie’s author website or editor website.

Where Is Linc’s Backpack? (Or: Lessons Learned From Brilliant Editors)

 

By F.T. Bradley

Editors don’t edit anymore. That’s what I heard more than once before I signed my book contract for Double Vision, my middle-grade series with HarperCollins Children’s. It’s one of those publishing myths that came from some unknown source, and you sort of assume it’s true when you’re a newbie.

Whoever said editors don’t edit is wronger than wrong (is wronger a word?). When I turned in my second (or it may have been third, or fourth…) draft of Double Vision, I thought the heavy lifting had to be done soon. Just a few minor edits, right?

Wrong (again). My editors—I have two: the brilliant Barbara Lalicki and awesome Andrew Harwell—sent me yet another copy of my manuscript, littered with notes and questions, like: What time is it here? Where is Linc’s (my main character) backpack? Why does he do this—oh, and shouldn’t he be wearing a coat in December? I would thumb through the pages thinking: this is going to be, like, a lot of work.

And it was—for all parties involved. If anyone can dispel this myth that editors don’t edit, it would be me. I have a stack of marked-up manuscripts, and emails well past office hours from my amazing editors at Harper to prove it. And I haven’t even told you about the copyediting and proofreading yet…

All this work might sound kind of depressing if you’re still waiting for that book contract—but guess what happened once I sat down to write the sequel to Double Vision? I started asking questions like: where’s Linc’s backpack? And it led to an unexpected plot twist.

Editors really do edit. And they’ll make you a stronger writer—at least, I’d like to think so.

BIO:

F.T. Bradley is the author of Double Vision (Harper Children's, Oct. 2012), the first in the middle-grade adventure series featuring Lincoln Baker. Her husband's Air Force career has F.T. and their two daughters moving all around the world, but for the moment the family lives on the Mississippi Gulf Coast. To find out more about F.T. and Double Vision, visit www.doublevisionbooks.com, or find F.T. Bradley on Twitter @FTBradleyAuthor.

ABOUT DOUBLE VISION:

Undercover spies, codes and ciphers, a secret painting with unimaginable powers... It's all in a day's work when you're one of the world's top kid agents. But Linc Baker isn't a kid agent at all. He just happens to look exactly like one of them. And when this lookalike goes missing, Linc will have to impersonate him on a mission that plunges him into a world of intrigue, danger, and great pastries. 
No pressure, right?

The Editing Process: Interview of a Freelance Editor

Are you thinking of using a freelance editor to go through your novel manuscript before sending it off to an agent or publisher or publishing it yourself? Smart move! I asked our regular guest blogger, Jodie Renner, who is a freelance fiction editor, to give us some ideas of what to expect when seeking out and working with a freelance editor.

MP: How do writers go about finding a freelance editor?

JR: They can just Google words like editing, fiction editor, editing services, freelance editor, copyediting, copy editor, copyediting services. Or go to the websites of editors’ associations like The Editorial Freelancers Association, http://www.the-efa.org/about.php or the Editors’ Association of Canada, http://www.editors.ca/ .

MP: How do I choose from several possible freelance editors for my novel?

JR: First, be sure they not only edit fiction, but also read and edit your genre. Visit their websites and check out their credentials and experience, and read about their process and editorial services offered. Ask the editors for references from former or current clients or check the testimonials on their website and consider contacting some of the authors who have written reviews there.
Also, it’s important to get a sample edit from several different editors. Many editors offer a 5- or 10-page free sample edit, or will edit several pages or your first chapter for a small fee. I would get at least 5 pages of your work edited as a sample. Be sure to send them all the same chapter— and your original, not one another editor has already gone through! This way you can see how each editor would handle your work. Also, if your spelling and grammar skills are a little rusty, get that aspect of the sample edit checked over by someone you know who’s good at that.

MP: What would you like potential clients include in an initial email to you?

JR: I often get this kind of email: “What are your rates for editing an 80,000-word manuscript?” There’s no way I can answer that without seeing at least 10 pages of the writing. In fact, before I can give potential clients a fee rate for their manuscript, I ask them to email me the genre, total (or projected) word count, a brief synopsis, a brief description of each of the main characters, the first 20 pages of the novel (double-spaced), and another 10 pages from somewhere in the middle. If the manuscript looks ready for copyediting and I have time to work on it soon, I do a free sample edit of the first 10 pages and send that back to the author, along with any other advice that may occur to me as I’m reading.

MP: What can writers expect from an editor and an editing process?

JR: Most freelance editors these days edit on-screen and online, using Microsoft Word Track Changes, so all of their changes are visible in red (or another color), and they add comments, suggestions and questions in boxes in the margin. You can accept or reject their changes and respond to the comments with another one of your own. At the end, you turn off the Track Changes function and delete the comments, and that becomes your final version – you don’t cut and paste it to another document, which could create new problems. Documents/Files are sent back and forth by email, as attachments.
But good editors will first assess the level of editing the manuscript needs to bring it up to current industry standards, which is almost always more than the writer realizes. Some manuscripts even need a major overhaul, starting with developmental editing; others need fairly heavy content editing for “big-picture” issues; others need stylistic help to smooth out the writing and make it clearer and more powerful; and some just need a final polish, to check for typos, grammatical error, and punctuation.
Often aspiring authors will contact me asking for a light final copyedit or proofread, when their manuscript really needs much more than that. It may be lacking in so many important ways that I can’t in good conscience take their money to just proofread it for grammar and spelling. In that case, I usually give the potential client some free recommendations of good books to read on the craft of fiction, as well as links to my articles on specific topics, such as opening, point of view, characterization, dialogue, scene structure, showing instead of telling, etc.

MP: What are the different levels of editing a novel manuscript could go through with freelance editing?

JR: These lines are fuzzy and vary within editing associations, and each editor has her/his own take on them, but here’s a general description of the various levels of freelance fiction editing in the order that they are carried out, from most extensive and expensive to final polishing touches. These levels are often carried out by different people. Developmental editors rarely do copyediting or final proofreading, and vice-versa.

1. Developmental Editing or a Manuscript Evaluation / Critique / Analysis
Developmental editors look at the big picture and the whole structure of your novel, including whether chapters and scenes should be moved, condensed, or even deleted. A developmental edit or critique / analysis will give general advice on premise, plot, structure, point of view, characterization, character arc, pacing, style, etc., as well as specific fiction techniques such as showing rather than telling, avoiding head-hopping and info dumps, etc.
Some editors like me offer an “initial critique” of the first 10, 20 or 30 pages, which is much easier on the wallet than an evaluation of the whole book, and will catch most weaknesses, such as problems with your opening, point of view, characterization, and dialogue, or recurring style issues.

2. Heavy Copyediting or Stylistic Editing
For fiction, this should include “big-picture” advice on the opening, point of view, characterization, plot holes, dialogue, pacing, and fiction techniques like showing instead of telling, avoiding “info dumps” and style gaffes, etc. May also offer suggestions to improve paragraphing, sentences, and words; cut down on wordiness; smooth awkward phrasing and transitions; comment on discrepancies and inconsistencies; and help with tone and mood—all while striving to keep the author's voice.

3. Medium Copyediting or Line Editing
Generally making the manuscript more readable. A line edit looks at the sentence structure, word choices, continuity and consistency. Often fixes awkward phrasing, smooths out rough or unclear writing, and decreases wordiness to make the writing tighter and more powerful.

4. Light Copyediting / Proofreading
For freelance editing, refers to final editing for grammar, spelling, punctuation, capitalization, and other mechanics of style. Puts the final polish on a very well-written story or a manuscript for which all issues have already been addressed and solved.

MP: Editors seem to have different fee structures and methods of charging for their services. What are some ways we can expect?

JR: Many freelance editors charge by the page, which normally means double-spaced, 12-point, so about 250 words per page. Others charge by the hour. I charge by the word, as to me, a page can end after a paragraph, or have graphics that don’t need to be edited, etc. Be sure to ask whether their rate includes a final proofreading, or whether that’s a separate process with an additional fee.

MP: How much do editors charge for editing a fiction manuscript?

JR: Rates for editing usually depend on the amount of time and work a manuscript needs, which can vary hugely. No reputable editor will give you a blanket rate for editing 80,000 words, for example, or 300 pages or whatever, without asking to see at least a chapter or two of the manuscript first. Some manuscripts can easily take ten times the amount of work as others, in order to bring them up to current industry standards. Experienced editors know this, so they won’t give you a set rate, sight-unseen. Rates also vary depending on the experience of the editor / copy editor / proofreader. Just as in any kind of services, be wary of rates that are too low.

Generally, a final proofread or light copyedit is much cheaper than content editing, but there’s no point in paying for a final proofread if your manuscript needs bigger issues solved first, before it gets to that stage.

Authors and aspiring authors – Do you have any other questions about the freelance editing process that you’d like clarified? Please ask them in the comments below and Jodie will attempt to answer them all. Also, see Jodie’s interview of another freelance editor, Robb Grindstaff, on Jodie’s blog at  http://jodierennerediting.blogspot.ca/2012/05/interview-with-robb-grindstaff.html

Style Blunders in Fiction, by Jodie Renner

No, I’m not talking about the fashion police coming after you. I’m talking about those little errors and bad habits that creep into your manuscript, weaken your message, and add up to an overall feeling of amateurish writing. The good news is that, unlike the more critical creative flow of ideas for plot and characters, these little bad habits are easy to correct, resulting in a much more polished, compelling manuscript.

1. Take out wishy-washy qualifiers like quite, sort of, almost, kind of, a bit, pretty, somewhat, rather, usually, basically, generally, probably, mostly, really, etc. Forget “He was quite brave,” or “She was pretty intelligent” or “It was almost scary.” These qualifiers dilute your message, reduce the impact, and make the imagery weaker. Take them out. Even very is to be avoided – it’s like you’re saying the word after it needs reinforcing. “She was beautiful” packs more punch than “She was very beautiful.”

2. Show us, don’t tell us how your characters are feeling. Avoid statements like, “He found that funny,” or “The little girl felt sad.” Show these emotions by their actions, words, and body language: “Eyes downcast, shoulders slumped, head down, she refused to answer as she pushed her food around the plate.”

3. Avoid colorless, overused verbs like walked, ran, went, saw, talked, ate, did, got, put, took. Get out your thesaurus (or use the MS Word one. Hint: look up the present tense: walk, run, eat, say, etc.) to find more expressive, powerful verbs instead, like crept, loped, stumbled, stomped, glimpsed, noticed, observed, witnessed, spied, grunted, whimpered, devoured, consumed, gobbled, wolfed, munched, or bolted.

4. Avoid –ing verbs wherever possible. Use -ed verbs instead – they’re stronger and more immediate. “He was racing” is weaker than “He raced.” “They searched the house” is more immediate than “They were searching the house.” Rewrite -ing verbs whenever you can, and you’ll strengthen your writing and increase its power.

5. Keep adverbs to a minimum. Instead of propping up a boring, anemic verb with an adverb, look for strong, descriptive, powerful verbs. Instead of “He walked slowly” go for “He plodded” or “He trudged” or “He dawdled.” Instead of “She ate hungrily” say “She devoured the bag of chips,” or “She wolfed down the pizza.” Instead of “They talked quickly,” say “They babbled.”

6. Use adjectives sparingly and consciously. Instead of stringing a bunch of adjectives in front of an ordinary, overused noun, find a more precise, expressive noun to show rather than tell. Overuse of adjectives can also turn your writing into “purple prose” that is melodramatic and overly “flowery.”

7. Dialogue tags – Stick with the basic he said and she said­ (or asked) wherever possible, rather than “he emphasized” or “she reiterated” or “Mark uttered,” etc. These phrases stand out, so they take the reader out of the story, whereas “said” is almost invisible. However, I like dialogue tags that describe how something is said, as in he shouted, she murmured, he grumbled, she whispered. You can often eliminate the dialogue tag altogether and just use an action beat instead: He picked up the phone. “That’s it. I’m calling the cops.”

8. Describe the stimulus, then the response: When writing an action scene, make sure your sentence structure mimics the order of the actions. The reader pictures the actions in the order that she reads them, so it’s confusing to read about the reaction before finding out what caused it. So describe the action first, then the reaction: Instead of “He yelled when the dog bit him,” write: “The dog bit him and he yelled.”

9. Avoid the passive voice: For greater impact, when describing an action, start with the doer, then describe what he did, rather than the other way around. Use the more direct active voice wherever possible. Instead of “The house was taped off by the police,” write “The police taped off the house.” Also, avoid empty phrases like “There is”, “There was,” “It’s,” “It was.” Jump right in with what you’re actually talking about.

10. Avoid negative constructions wherever possible – they can be confusing to the reader. Instead of “I didn’t disagree with him,” say “I agreed with him.”

11. Avoid frequent repetition of the same word or forms of the same word. If you’ve already used a certain noun or verb in a paragraph or section, go to your thesaurus to find a different way to express that idea when you mention it again. Also, avoid repetition of the same imagery. Whether you’re describing the setting, the weather, or the hero or heroine, vary your wording.

12. Avoid formal sentences and pretentious language. Rather than impressing your readers, ornate, fancy words can just end up alienating them. As Jessica Page Morrell says, “if a reader is constantly consulting a dictionary when reading your prose, you’re dragging him from the story. Words in manuscripts such as capacious, accretion, plangent, occluded, viridian, arboreal, sylvan, obdurant, luculent, longueur, rubescent, and mendacious always pull me from the story. Just say no to showing off.”

As Morrell points out, “Simple words are close to our hearts and easily understood…. simpler words are unpretentious, yet contain power and grace….Pompous words are alienating, boring, and outdated.”

* * *

Copyright © Jodie Renner, July 2011

Resources: Thanks, But This Isn’t For Us, by Jessica Page Morrell; Manuscript Makeover, by Elizabeth Lyon; How NOT to Write a Novel, by Howard Mittelmark and Sandra Newman.

Jodie Renner is a freelance fiction manuscript editor, specializing in thrillers, romantic suspense, and mysteries. Her services range from developmental editing to light final copyediting, as well as manuscript critiques. Check out Jodie’s website at www.JodieRennerEditing.com and her blog at http://JodieRennerEditing.blogspot.com.

Jodie is a member of International Thriller Writers (associate), Sisters in Crime (SinC), Backspace: The Writers Place, The Editorial Freelancers Association (EFA), and The Editors Association of Canada (EAC).

Jodie has traveled extensively throughout North America, Europe and the Middle East. In fact, Jodie loves traveling so much, she’s thinking of changing her tagline from “Let’s work together to enhance and empower your writing” to “Have laptop, will travel.”