Top Ten Tips for Debut Authors

By John Clement

I won’t bore you with a lengthy essay on how the world of publishing can feel like a vast, unknowable, and terrifying behemoth to a debut author. 

I figure if you’re reading this there’s a pretty good chance you’ve already figured that out. Instead, I’ll take this opportunity to share the knowledge I’ve acquired in my one-and-a-half year career as a published author. 

I’m using the “Top Ten” format to make everything as concise and helpful as possible, but I should point out right off the bat that there may not be enough knowledge to make it all the way to #10. Let’s find out, shall we?

#1. Don’t Write Top Ten Lists.
I’m told Top Ten lists are much more likely to get quoted and shared and emailed around the Internet, thereby reaching more readers (and thus more book-buyers), but a Google search of the phrase “Top Ten List” produces a catalog of roughly 1,700,000,000 entries. Try to be more original. For example, a Google search for “Top Three and 1/2 List” gets zero results. Write a Top Three and 1/2 List and you’ll stand out like a sore thumb. You’re welcome.

#2. Writer’s Conferences. Go to them.  

If, like me, you don’t enjoy conferences or big crowds of people in general, go to them anyway. I prefer small groups of people. Three is ideal, four is pushing it. Plus I have a bad case of (self-diagnosed) Central Auditory Processing Disorder, a physical and/or neurological and/or psychological impairment that affects the ear, whose job it is to separate essential sound from background noise and deliver only the essential sound to the intellectual center of the brain. 

Although I’m not altogether certain my brain has an intellectual center, I do know that I go into overload whenever I’m in a room filled with talking people. A writer’s conference is essentially a room filled with talking people, but I’ve attended three conferences so far, and I can say without hesitation that writers, and in particular, mystery writers, are the most helpful, supportive and generous people in the world. You’d be amazed how much encouragement and inspiration you can get from talking to other writers, and you’ll make great friends.

#3. Don’t read reviews of your book.

No matter how tempting. Not even the good ones. There’s no better way to fuck up your inner voice than to let other voices in. I curse because I mean it.

#3 1/2. Don't spend too much time reading blogs about writing and the publishing industry.

(Or, for that matter, playing online Scrabble with Facebook friends from high school). It's accepted wisdom that your second book will be harder to write than your first. I learned that at a conference and it's true. So don't sweat it. Just close your web browser and go write for a while.

BIO:
John Clement is the author of the popular Dixie Hemingway Mystery Series created by his mother, writer Blaize Clement (1932-2011). The eighth book in the series, The Cat Sitter’s Cradle (2013 St. Martins/Minotaur) received unanimous praise from fans and critics alike. The Cat Sitter’s Nine Lives will appear July, 2014. John lives in New York City, where he’s currently working on the 10th book in the series.


THE CAT SITTER'S CRADLE: Blaize Clement won fans all over the world with the charm and wit of her pet-sitting mysteries. Now, with the help of her son, author John Clement, Blaize’s beloved heroine Dixie Hemingway is back for yet another thrilling adventure in this critically-acclaimed series.

Dixie has built a nice, quiet life for herself in the sleepy town of Siesta Key, a sandy resort island off the coast of Florida.
In fact, her pet-sitting business is going so well she’s even taken on part-time

help: Kenny, a handsome young surfer who lives alone in a rickety old houseboat. Things get a little messy, however, when on an early morning walk in the park with a client’s schnauzer, Dixie makes a shocking discovery. Hidden among the leafy brambles is a homeless girl, alone and afraid, cradling a newborn baby in her arms.

Dixie takes the young girl under her wing, even though she’s just been hired by Roy Harwick, the snarky executive of a multi-national oil and manufacturing company, to care for his equally snarky Siamese cat, Charlotte, along with his wife’s priceless collection of rare tropical fish. It’s not long before Dixie stumbles upon a dead body in the unlikeliest of places, and soon she’s set adrift in a murky and dangerous world in which no one is who they appear to be.

Smart, fast-paced and entertaining, The Cat Sitter’s Cradle is a perfect illustration of why Dixie’s loyal fans have come to know and love her and eagerly await the next installment of her adventures.


 

She’s Your Agent, Not Your Mother

By Dennis Palumbo

 

There's an old joke about the relationship between writers and their agents: a veteran writer comes home to find police and fire trucks crowding the street, surrounding the smoking remains of his house. 

Stricken, he asks the officer in charge what happened. The cop shakes his head and says, "Well, it looks like your agent came to your house, murdered your entire family, took all your valuables, then burned the place to the ground."

To which the writer responds, with an astonished smile, "My agent came to my house?"

A telling joke. As a published author myself, as well as a psychotherapist who works with creative people, I'm very familiar with the complicated, confusing and sometimes combative connection between writers and their agents.  Yet what makes that relationship so difficult often has nothing to do with the agent, and everything to do with the writer.

Like it or not, here are three sobering facts:

First, your agent is not your parent. It's not the agent's job to encourage, support or validate your creative ambitions, insofar as they reflect your inner need to be loved and cherished. Such needs were your birthright, and, hopefully, were given to you in your childhood. If, however, they were not, it's not your agent's job to pick up the slack.

Second, your agent is in business to make money. This is not a crime against humanity, an affront to the arts, nor a personal repudiation of your aesthetic dreams. It's just a fact.

And, lastly, while your agent may indeed admire your talent, and share with you lofty creative and financial goals, he or she is not obligated to care about them as much as you do. In fact, no one cares about your career as much as you do. Which means the burden of worrying about your artistic aspirations, income, reputation in the field, and level of personal and professional satisfaction rests entirely on your shoulders.

It’s important to remember these facts. Otherwise, a writer can come to expect too much from an agent in terms of esteem-building, validation and empathy. Which means that every unreturned phone call, every less-than-ecstatic response to a new piece of work or proposed project, every real or imagined shift in vocal tonality during a conversation is experienced by the writer as an injury to his or her self-worth. 

The wise writer understands this, if only theoretically, and should at least strive to keep his or her relationship with an agent in context. Hopefully it will lessen the blows, whatever they are and whenever they come.

Otherwise, what you’re seeking is not an agent but an approving parent. And, hell, I ought to know. I’ve done it myself. And still do, on occasion.  So, despite what I’ve just said, when you find yourself feeling the same way, give yourself a break. Take a breath, mentally re-group, and get back to writing.   

In the end, nothing---and no one---is more validating.   

About Dennis: 

Formerly a Hollywood screenwriter (My Favorite Year; Welcome Back, Kotter, etc.), DENNIS PALUMBO is now a licensed psychotherapist and author of the Daniel Rinaldi mysteries, the latest of which is Night Terrors (Poisoned Pen Press). 

Visit Dennis at www.dennispalumbo.com.

The latest Rinaldi book:

 

In NIGHT TERRORS, the latest in the acclaimed Daniel Rinaldi mystery series, the Pittsburgh psychologist is asked by the FBI to treat one of their recently-retired profilers. 

After a 20-year career inside the minds of the most infamous serial killers, Agent Lyle Barnes can no longer sleep through the night. Not only is he tormented by horrifying nocturnal images, he's also the target of an unknown assassin who’s already killed three others on a seemingly-random hit-list.

The Book Signing Boogie

The Book Signing Boogie

by Ricky Bush       

I always wanted to sit behind a stack of my books at a bookstore one day and sign copies for those interested in my tale of words. Once River Bottom Blues hit the market, that little dream became one step closer to reality.

First stop was the local bookstore. The owner showed interest but said that signings really didn’t do too well unless a downtown event brought in additional foot traffic. She suggested that I wait for such.   

Not wanting to wait three months for an inaugural singing, I dropped by a popular coffeehouse/pizza parlor and see if they’d be interested in hosting my book launch. The proprietor was surprisingly enthused about the idea and refused any type of consignment deal, which meant all proceeds went to me.

The local media ran a press release touting the event and I envisioned tons of my ex-students from the past twenty nine years waiting in line to grab a copy from their old teacher, not to mention all my ex-teacher chums. The fifteen I sold disappointed me, but I’ve since learn that those numbers weren’t bad at all.

I headed out of town for my next venture, meeting with the manager of a bookstore which also sold musical instruments, music, and rented movies. Since my book mixed blues with the murder plot, it seemed ideal. The kicker was that the manager loved blues music and promised plenty of promotion. A week before the signing, I checked to confirm and found that he had quit and left town. Before he left he had he paired me up with another author’s signing. Said author’s book subject was on sexual fitness. Most customers who came in that day went straight to the movie section to return and get another. We each sold five books.

The local bookstore called to say that a huge antique festival in a neighboring town would take place soon and lots of folks would be bunking in our town, which meant throngs of people would traipse by the bookstore. I sold five more copies.

Then I lined up a signing at a shop specializing in blues music memorabilia in another neighboring town and in conjunction with the birthday celebration of a long dead famous blues musician. The shop sponsored a concert out their back door and I just knew that a blues crowd would jump on a chance to buy my book. Six were sold.        

My most anticipated event was to sign books at Murder By The Book in Houston. The best blues harmonica player in the city offered to provide a little blues music background. I also lined up a signing at a blues jam at one of the best blues clubs in town following the bookstore gig. Six were sold at the store and five at the blues jam.

So, I can’t say that my experience was a rousing success, but I did meet a lot of fine folks along the way.

River Bottom Blues Synopsis

Ex-reporter Mitty Andersen sets out to prove that someone killed his good friend and fellow bluesman, Bobby Tarleton. After teaming up with his running buddy, Pete Bolden, they discover that Bobby just might be the last in a string of unsolved murders aimed at blues musicians. Their investigation leads them to the dark crossroads in Texas, where murder and blues mix and mingle.

Author Bio

Richard “Ricky” Bush has listened to, written about, and played the blues for most of his adult life. After retiring from teaching journalism, English, and world geography to a couple of generation of Texas teenagers, he incorporated his passion for the music into his debut thriller, River Bottom Blues, featuring the blues playing, crime fighting duo of Mitty Andersen and Pete Bolden. The Devil’s Blues continues their adventures and is due for release soon by Barking Rain Press.

           

Visit Ricky here.